35 years ago today was the happiest day of my first twenty-three years. After a rocky four years of on-again, off-again dating I married my best friend (not to be confused with my BESTEST friend, Lanie), John Randall Sloan in Decatur, Illinois at Grace Methodist Church at 2:00 PM.
After getting engaged on October 26 (the 4th anniversary of meeting), I had less than two months to plan the wedding and for anyone who thinks it can't be done or that you have to settle, it's not true. It just takes determination. I had everything just the way I wanted it; well, considering it was a Christmas wedding instead of a spring one. I had wanted to be married previously on May Day, my mother's birthday. But, Randy and I had tried a long engagement before and it didn't work for us. So, after the October proposal and the fact that he had off work from Caterpillar Tractor Company for the two weeks over Christmas & New Year's and I had the same two weeks off from my teaching position, it just made sense to have ready-made time for a honeymoon!
Although I bought my wedding dress off the clearance rack for $150, it was exactly the style I wanted.
Randy & I with his folks George & D'Arbra (DeFore) Sloan
I wanted a fountain, a unique cake topper and Christmas lights with greenery on my cake and that's what I got.
Fountain is on the bottom layer, surrounded by greenery with lights woven through. Top it off with my brandy snifter cake top and I was ecstatic!
I wanted to have fun cutting the cake and feeding it to one another, but when Randy wouldn't bite the fairly large piece I had in my hand... I just shoved it all in his mouth! I definitely enjoyed it more than he did...
Enjoying the moment Randy couldn't talk!
I didn't want my bridesmaids to wear hats which were so popular or carry goofy bouquets, so my florist helped me come up with the fabulous idea of having them carry brandy snifters with greenery and a lit candle inside and a white velvet ribbon tied on the stem. We also decided to get a sprig of holly for each to pin in her hair! Awesome... but who knew that holly does NOT have berries in December?!?!?! Oh well, we all had a good laugh about the "trees" that they wore in their hair.
The original plan was for green velvet dresses, but when the salesgirl in the bridal store showed me pictures of a green velvet wedding that looked like all the bridesmaids were in mourning, I reconsidered. We picked out the dresses in Champaign, Illinois (near wear Robyn lived) with only Robyn & Amy present. Vickie & Lanie got what we picked and didn't even get to see or try on the dresses until after the rehearsal & dinner the night before! We were hoping Lanie's would fit okay; she had just had her first baby three weeks before!
While the ladies were running all over central Illinois, trying on dresses and leaving them for poor Robyn's mother to alter & hem to bring to the wedding in Decatur (about an hour away) the next day, Randy was being thrown a bachelor party by his bestest friend, Curt Majors, who had introduced us.
Randy with Curt Majors before the ceremony.
No one knows for sure how much scotch Randy had to drink that night, but Curt & my brother Al did a good job keeping his glass full all evening! So much so that when I went over to my future in-law's house the morning of the wedding to help put finishing touches on everything there for the second reception, I had to help clean up Randy's puke from all over the basement! (I also learned that "Mom" had taken his 100% virgin wool sweater that I had given Randy the previous Christmas and threw it not only in the washing machine on hot, but had also thrown it into the dryer... it fit Barton when he was six....) Fortunately the illness improved by the ceremony, but he was still drunk and remembers nothing of the ceremony, the reception or the ride to O'Hare airport with my brother Al until the next day when we got up for our flight to Kiawah Island, South Carolina.
With my brothers: Bill & Al
I had both of my brothers stand to give me away at the beginning of the ceremony, but it was my brother Bill who walked me down the aisle while Al was one of Randy's groomsmen.
Ready to walk down the aisle with Bill.
My aunt, Dorothy (DeeDee) filled in as mother of the bride and I wore the locket my father gave my mother for her eighteenth birthday that she wore for her wedding.
With DeeDee
My bouquet was white roses with red baby's breath to keep with the color scheme and the Methodist Church was decorated with one hundred poinsettia plants. (Poinsettias were not my flower of choice, BUT they had been donated by church members to decorate the sanctuary for the Christmas season and, hey, you can't knock free flowers for a wedding!)
With Mom Sloan
Randy's mother had requested that she not have to wear a dress like she had for his brother's wedding three months before. I saw no reason not to honor that request, so she fasted for forty days and wore a beautiful green velvet pant suit. We felt very blessed that Randy's only surviving grandparent, "Big Grandma" DeFore was able to be at the wedding.
Randy & I with Big Grandma Olive Fanny (McCosh) DeFore
Finding enough groomsmen to match my bridesmaids was a bit of a challenge, especially considering we also had to come up with ushers! So, in addition to best man, Curt, Randy's brother Judd, my brother Al and some dude Randy knew from Caterpillar, we ended up with ushers Larry Bear (a friend of Zeta sister Sug Lyons) and Randy's cousin Louis... who we hoped wouldn't be ushered out of the church in handcuffs....
I was so excited to have so many people in attendance! Besides having so many of our good friends with us, several of my aunts and uncles made it down from the Chicago area for the wedding; my niece & nephews were there; and even some of my dad's friends made it. One in particular, Marv Hanse, one of my dad's best friend's was there and when I saw him at my reception, I was moved to tears to think that he had made that effort for me.
I was also VERY excited that so many of my sorority sisters came back to Decatur on their Christmas breaks to be there with me!
Robbin Campbell, Laura Mullen, Vickie O'Riley, Me, Laura Phillips, Tricia Heywood, Robyn Wise & Melissa Reichert
The final bit of unique that was my wedding came about during our minister interview weeks before the wedding. As we arranged to have the minister conduct the ceremony, we also needed to arrange for the music. Assuming we would just have the traditional wedding march, I was a bit surprised when the organist said that there was something he had always wanted to play for the wedding march for a Christmas-time wedding. When he told me it was "O' Come All Ye Faithful," I thought "Well, why not?" So that's exactly what we did. It was a little hard for my bridesmaids; not exactly sure if they were supposed to sing along with the guests as they marched in or not, but it was beautiful with the lit candles in their snifters. Although, I'm divorced now, the song still holds a special place in my heart and brings back fond memories of a special day when I married my best friend.
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