Most of you have probably figured out by now that I'm a quite proud mother. Every one of them does something every day that makes me proud of the women and men they've grown up to become. They try to trick me into "admitting" that one or the other is my "favorite child" regularly. The truth is, every one of them is my favorite for different reasons, because each of them has unique skills, talents, strengths and personalities and I've learned to reach out to each one for different reasons and, at that moment, that child is my favorite for that moment.
Beyond all that, twice a year I have a special pride in each of my sons, and they're my favorites at that time. Last night was one of those times. Let me give you a little background....
As Randy was not active in our faith for most of my children's lives, they all learned to turn to other men at church to be their male role models. Men like Greg Gorrell, Tom Spellman, Mark Rice, Barry Blum and so many others provided blessings, performed baptisms and set the example my children could look up to. They filled in areas that were empty in my children's lives.
Twice each year, The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints holds General Conference. Conference is held in Salt Lake City, but is broadcast by satellite to chapels all over the world as well as being televised on BYU-TV and on the Internet on LDS.org. There are four sessions of conference: a morning and an afternoon session each on the first weekend (Sat & Sun) every April & October. About a week before General Conference, there is a General Women's Conference broadcast to the chapels for all women of the church ages 8 and above. The Saturday evening during General Conference weekend, there is a priesthood session for all men of the church, ages 12 & above.
While I always made sure that my children watched at least part of the General Conference each time, we relied upon those various male role models to make sure Brandon & Barton made it to priesthood while we lived in Ohio. After we made the move to Utah in 1997, Amy's husband, Tim, made sure the boys made it to priesthood, along with his elder son, Bryan who is eight months older than my boys.
That worked out well, until Tim passed away from pancreatic cancer. I made the mistake of assuming some of the men from church, at least the young men's leaders, would make sure these young men had a way to priesthood. Imagine my surprise when I realized the boys took it upon themselves to get to the chapel themselves to attend priesthood by themselves, since no one bothered to invite them or arrange to pick them up! Needless to say, I wasn't pleased.
I was still upset a month later and I found myself walking to the pulpit during Fast & Testimony meeting. (The first Sunday of every month, Latter Day Saints fast for 2 meals and then have an opportunity to bear testimony to those in the congregation, rather than having scheduled speakers and assigned talks.) As I approached the pulpit, it was my intention to merely state my pride in my sons and my nephew; three young men who were strong enough and dedicated enough to do what they knew was right to attend priesthood by themselves, while most young men try to find ways out of attending with their fathers. After expressing my pride in the boys, however, I'm afraid I found myself blasting the men of our ward and expressing my disappointment that there wasn't a man among them who thought to reach out to these fine young men.
As I returned to my seat and my children praised my embarrassing behavior, I realized that there was a lesson to be learned here. I made my sons promise me that when they grew up, whenever conference time rolled around, they would look for at least one young man who didn't have an active father in the church and give that young man the opportunity to attend priesthood with them.
Which brings me to the topic of this post.... Since they've grown up, as soon as my boys leave priesthood session, they've made a habit of calling me to report on the meeting. Who spoke?; What were their favorite talks?; What were the talks about? And, they always know that I'm going to ask if they took a young man with them. While living in Kentucky, Bart was the Young Men's President, meaning he was the adult male in charge of the young men from 12-18, so he was always accompanied by at least one young man. I was always so proud of all the things he did with "his" young men and that he was taking time to be a good example for all those young men.
It's been a little harder for Brandon, since he hasn't been involved in the young men program yet, but last night when he called he sounded very excited and proud to tell me that he would have called sooner, but he needed to take the missionaries AND a young man home first! This young man began coming to church on his own, took missionary discussions and was baptized, and Banny gave him the opportunity to attend priesthood with him! And he was so pumped when he reported on the talks and the speakers they had.
Like I said, I'm always very proud of ALL my kids. But, I'm especially proud twice each year as I recognize that there is a single mom out there who can rest assured that there are other men who will set the example for her son; or as I realize that there is a young man who's trying to do what's right by himself who can gain a little bit of support from one of my boys.
