EY #9: Tell about your Dad

Dad's Birth Certificate

Today, Memorial Day 2013, it's only fitting that I remember my dad.  Ninety-one years ago today, May 27, 1922, Raymond Carl Friedrich Zielke was born in Downers Grove, Illinois.  Well, as you can see above, Raymond Zielke was born.  He was later christened with the full name and went by Raymond Carl through his life.

He was the only son born to his mother, Martha Staffeldt.  He had two half brothers, George & Henry and one half sister, Bertha. They were also cousins!

My grandfather first married her sister, Louisa Staffeldt.  She died in childbirth and my grandmother began taking care of the children.  Reinhold then married Martha and they had five more children: Helen, my dad, Grace, Marge & Dorothy.  Grandma adopted the oldest three when they were all adults so that when she passed away, property could be divided up properly without penalty on taxes.

Marge, Dorothy, Henry, Bertha, Ray & George
Helen, Grandma & Grace

I love looking at pictures of my dad when he was young.  He never looks particularly happy in the pictures until he got a little older.  Turns out, I learned from Aunt Grace a few years ago, that he hated having his picture taken and would actually try to hide.  Guess that's why he looked so grumpy!

I think he's here with 

sister Bertha

Or, why he didn't look at the camera...

But, as he got older, if you put an animal in the picture with him, apparently it made it more tolerable for him...

With his Spitz

He was raised on a farm and remained a "farm boy" at heart throughout his life.  

With his pony
(As I recall, his father sold the
pony one day while he was at school.)

He became a carpenter and a General Contractor.  He was very good at his trade, but I don't think it ever gave him quite the satisfaction working a farm did.  Even while doing his carpentry, he still helped maintain the farmland my grandmother owned until she passed away, when it was sold off for distribution among all the siblings.

Farming was such a part of his life that nearly every weekend I can remember

until I was eight-years-old, we spent Sunday afternoons going for drives and looking at farms to buy!  Why did it stop then, you ask?  Because he bought one!  When I was eight, we moved from Illinois to our farm in Watertown, Wisconsin.  And then... whenever we went to a fair, we had to look at all the animals and farm equipment before we could go on the rides.  It was times like that I really wished I had a sibling my own age to go on the rides with me, but with two much older brothers, I couldn't ride the rides 'til Dad was ready to take me!

School was not for my dad.  I also learned from an aunt many years after he died, that he never graduated from high school.  Could have fooled me!  I always thought this was his senior picture:

He never hid the fact that he didn't like school and I recall a story about him rolling down the stairs in a fight with a teacher.... I'm not sure why he didn't like school.  I know he could do math and I know he could read, but then again, school isn't for everyone.

I recently found this picture of my folks.  I don't recall ever seeing it before, but I love the way my mom is looking at my dad.  (I know she loved the wave in his hair.)

My dad was a good dad.  He worked long and hard and didn't spend an extraordinary amount of time with us, but he loved us and taught us to work hard and to have values and integrity.  He had a great sense of humor and laughed freely and easily.  One of the things I enjoyed most when he got together with any of his brothers or sisters was the laughter all around.

Dad with Billy & Allen
(Probably early 1948)

I know that I was the spoiled one though.  I was the baby girl and the one that was never supposed to be.  I was my dad's "Baby Snooks" (after a cartoon character) and later his "Peanut."

Dad with Boots & me
(Boots was exactly 1 year and 2 days older than me)

My special time with my dad was on my mom's bowling night.  Every Monday night she'd go bowling with her league and I'd spend the evening sitting on my dad's lap watching Ben Casey!

Sitting on my dad's lap.

Dad was tickled with his grandchildren and enjoyed playing with them and teasing them.  Such a tragedy that he only lived to know four of the eleven.

Grandpa & Gail Lynn 1969

Dad smoked his whole life, but oddly enough, it wasn't lung cancer that claimed his life, but rather bone cancer.  He enjoyed hunting (although he never got anything; I think he just enjoyed the time with "the guys.").  He enjoyed fishing after we bought the cabins in Wisconsin.  (I don't recall him ever fishing before that.)  He also enjoyed snowmobiling in the later years and he bought me my own snowmobile suit and helmet.

He was the tallest man in his family at 6'1". Dad had the most amazing blue eyes.  More of a turquoise than true blue.  And they sparkled when he teased or smiled at you. He didn't have the best teeth, suffering from pyorrhea, and he got false teeth in the late 60's.  (He didn't enjoy eating berries much after that...)  But his smile lit up his face and the smile went all the way to his eyes.  I know this isn't the best picture; the color is faded; but this is the look I remember the most.  When my dad would look at me and smile and tell me that he loved me.

Happy Birthday, Daddy.

I love you.

LL #2: Jana and Her Mom

Jana and her Mom

I've picked up a few "extra" children in my life.  I inherited them from my own children.  They were always the best friends of my kids and they all had a welcome, happy spot in my home and in my heart.

One of these "extra" kids of mine is Jana (Stokes) Newell.  Jana was Brooks' roommate and best friend at BYU-Idaho, but her sense of humor, knack for making the absurd a reality and her loving nature cinched her place in the family with all five of my children.

Today, my heart aches for our Jana Mae.  I know how she feels.  I know what she's going through and yet, there's not a thing I can do to take away the pain or the sorrow.  Two days ago, Jana lost her mother and Jana's life will never be the same.

The real tragedy is the fact that Jana just got her mother back a few years ago.  She had been in poor health all of Jana's life and it seemed to be getting worse during the years Jana lived with me in Post Falls, Idaho (2006-2011).   There were many times that Jana almost wished that her mother could pass on then, to end her suffering and the pain it caused her father to watch the suffering.

There were times in Jana's adolescence that it was just Jana and her "pops."  Her mother was in a nursing home part of the time and even when she was at home, Jana had to be a caregiver; forced to grow up and help her dad as best she could.  In fact, during the time Jana spent with Brooks and then with me were the first times in her life that she could recall actually feeling like a kid; enjoying doing a lot of the goofy things teenagers usually do

But, then, the last few months I lived in Post Falls, Jana began getting reports of her mother's improving health.   Jana didn't want to get her hopes up, but she really seemed to be on the mend!  She even began traveling with Jana's dad and made it up to Post Falls to visit Jana!  As her health improved, she had the opportunity to see two grandchildren born (to Jana's older brother, Jay) and to see Jana married to her wonderful husband, Matt Newell.

Donna lovingly looking at her grandson

The day before Donna passed away, she commented that she had never felt better in her life and as she was going into the hospital for an MRI on May 24th, she told her son, Jay, that it wasn't her time to go yet.  Sadly, Jay now remembers that as only the second time in his life that she had ever lied to him (the first being Santa Claus).

So, now, as Jana and the rest of her family wonder why now?  Why, when her life was so good? Why when they were all so happy? And I have no answers for them and can offer them nothing that will take the pain away, all I can say is Hunny... remember the good times.  Remember the laughter and the love and know that she had the blessing of experiencing it all for one more period of her life.  Rather than losing her when she seemingly had nothing to live for, now she was able to take with her the joy, the love and the laughter.  She'll be watching over you all now; preparing a place for you all when you join her when your life's journey draws to an end.  

But in the meantime, Hunny.  Laugh.  Remember the happy times and the fun.  I know no one else will understand this video clip, but I hope it will bring you some laughter through the tears.  

Sweet Caroline

(Mwah, Mwah, Mwah...Good times never seemed so good...)

Well, hopefully that didn't backfire on me and make it worse.  Know that your Sloan family loves you and is thinking about you and focus on all the good that your mother brought into your life. She was a good woman who loved you with all her heart.  Love ya, Hunny...

Those were the Days

LN#6 Tell about proud moments as a grandmother: Part 3

I have one grandson that I have a little bit of an extra connection with.  Some of you may not believe it, but I saw him as a three or four-year-old before he was ever born!  Heck, it was before his parents even thought of him!  I know.  I know.  I thought I was seeing things, but it's true. He doesn't look exactly like the little boy I saw, but his personality is exactly the same.

Ethan & I
February, 2013

So, let me explain.  I mentioned that Josh & Brooks lived with me the summer  after they got married.  Well, one weekend when I was home, I had Josh working on some project (as usual) or other in their bedroom.  (He may have been building the wardrobe.)  Anyway, something happened and Josh just said to himself "Caaarefullll..."  He used to say that a lot. Funny.  Now that he has children and one would expect to hear him say "careful" a lot, I can't remember the last time I heard him say it!  Anyway, at that exact moment when he said "Caaarefulll..." I looked down and had a kind of vision.  There was a blond little boy standing next to Josh; intently watching what Josh was doing and when Josh said "careful" the little boy stopped watching Josh, looked up at him, looked at me and ran from the room trying not to cry.  I wanted to run after the little boy and give him a hug, but, of course, there wasn't a little boy there.

I didn't say anything to Josh or Brooks at the time.  I figured they'd think I was nuts.  But then one day, they mentioned to me that they didn't know if they were doing the right thing waiting to have children or if they should start their family.  At that point, I figured that maybe I should tell them about my experience.  Less than a year later, on May 25, 2004 Ethan Raymond Gailey was born!  Since his middle name is Raymond, after my father, I always kind of wished he had been born two days later, on my dad's birthday, but oh well.. He's recently come to understand how special it is to be named after his grandpa and proudly announces the fact that he was named after a very special man!

Ethan - 1 year

So, who is Ethan?  Ethan is probably the most loving, caring, compassionate, concerned nine-year-old I have ever met.  As the oldest child in the family, I know his parents have had high expectations of him (as most parents do of their first born) and he strives to live up to those expectations.  He takes everything to heart; whether it's a scripture lesson or something his parents have told him should happen or will happen, he has total faith and trust in whatever it is.  He takes his role as "big brother" especially seriously, helping to "discipline" his siblings, watching out for them, distracting them, playing with them, whatever his parents need him to do with them.  He was especially thrilled in February to get his first little sister and really loves her!

Sloan, Ethan (holding Claire) & Mason
February, 2013

I thought poor Ethan was going to go crazy waiting for news that his little sister was here the day Brooks went to the hospital.  He knew that it would take awhile, but he sure couldn't stand the suspense and when I finally got word an hour after he went to bed, I decided it was worth it to go wake him up and let him know his sister was here.  Not quite the reaction I expected, when he just nodded his head, but I understood the reaction the next morning when he woke up and didn't remember me coming in to wake him at all!  But he was very excited to get to miss school that day to go to the hospital to meet her and could hardly wait to get his hands on her after she was born.

Ethan holding Claire in the hospital.

Ethan is a very smart young man and is very analytical.  He likes to understand things.  He's also a planner and needs to know what's happening when and how things are going to happen and he wants to know about the "what ifs!"  He's very cautious and a bit of a worrier; harder on himself than anyone could possibly be on him.  If he does something wrong, he really beats himself up inside, feeling like he's let someone else down or hurt someone.  Three weeks ago, when we were all in Kentucky he was pushing a younger cousin on the swing.  Not realizing that Bennett was still a little young to hold on well by himself, Ethan pushed just a little too hard and Bennett landed on the ground.  Bennett was fine, cried only a minute, but I know Ethan was crying on the inside much longer.  That's the sensitive little boy spirit that I saw all those years ago. And my heart hurt for him and I had to go and talk to him, even though I knew that no matter what I said, he would still not be ready to forgive himself.

Ethan & Sloan on the hull of their
driftwood pirate ship!
Mukilteo Lighthouse Beach

Ethan is very tolerant & respectful of others; especially this grandma!  I mentioned that he's a bit of a worrier, yet in spite of that and the fact that his mom tells him not to go outside without his shoes on, when Grandma told him to take off his shoes at the beach (see above), he reluctantly did so.  It went something like this:
    "Boys, why don't you take your shoes off to play in the sand and go down 
         by the water?"
    "Huh?"
    "Why don't you take off your shoes?"
    "My mom won't let us play outside without our shoes on."
    "You're on a beach."
    Blank stare
    "You don't wear shoes to play in the sand and the water."
    "But mom would yell at us.  She never lets us go outside without our shoes 
         on."    "Yeah?  Well, your mom's not here and this is Grandma.  Live a    
         little.  Have some fun and don't worry.... give me your shoes."  
     And he did, and they all had fun on the beach and we played for a couple 
         hours AND everyone left the beach with all their toes intact!

He's also tolerant of me and my stories about the "olden days."  In fact, sometimes he asks about them.  He probably gets that from his mom.  She was always the one asking me those questions and I'm sure she tells him stories about her childhood; whether he asks or she just volunteers, I have no idea.  But I know that he also gets exposure to some of "my" music through her.  All of my kids have an appreciation for the old stuff and the younger generation of the family even has some favorites.  This is one of Ethan's...

Elton John singing Crocodile Rock

(Music & video don't seem to sync, but still a fun song!)

He has a goofy side too.  I used to love it when he was a toddler and he'd dance to the music on his Fridge Farm.  And the day he met my Aunt Grace and Uncle Austin as a toddler he had everyone in stitches just because he was laughing so hard at his "binky" falling out of his mouth and bouncing on the carpet.  His laughter was infectious and created a wonderful memory!"

.

Ethan with Andi & Aunt Grace
March, 2008

Like all little boys, he loves video games and movies; superheroes and make-believe.  He had a special fascination with Indiana Jones when he was very young and I seem to recall that he wore his Spiderman suit until he completely wore it out (it didn't matter that he outgrew it before it wore out)!

So, all of these things about Ethan are great, but the thing that impresses me the most about Ethan is his selfless love and concern for others.  When they stayed with me a couple of years ago, he knew how sad I would be when they left.  So Ethan and his brothers wrote little messages on hearts and left them all over my apartment for me to find later.  I'm still finding some that were hid the best!  And whenever I do find a lost one, it brings a smile to my face and a reminder that he really does love his old grandma.  And I don't even have a birthday present for him yet!  This young man can NEVER think of anything he wants, because toys are expensive and he doesn't want to think of me spending my money on him.  For Christmas, all he could think of was a "Twister" game! There's something about a kid that doesn't want anything that makes you want to give him even more... except I can't think of anything either!  So, Ethan.... know that I love you and I'm thinking about you today on YOUR special day... and I will get you SOMETHING for your birthday, but for now, know too that you are one of God's greatest blessings to me and to your family.  I loved you before you were born and I love you still.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

WC #11: Another special day! Birthdays, Baptisms & Endowments!

And yet another special day in May!  Today we celebrate yet another family birthday AND this one holds special significance for Brooks, Brandon and Barton... and even a third (almost brother), Daniel Gorrell; their good childhood friend from Ashland, Ohio.  This day is also rather related to yesterday's post in that it's also about my "forever family!"

So, let's start with the birthday wishes!  Some people may think it a bit odd that I would mention the birthday of a lovely woman who is no longer "technically" in the family, but she is the mother of a niece and a nephew and was the big sister I always dreamed of as a little girl.

Marcia Lee Westphal was born May 23, 1948 and married my brother Al on August 13, 1966.  Marcia gave me the best Christmas presents!  It was like there was a GIRL who could understand me around the house!  And one of my best memories of Marcia was when my grandmother was ill in Illinois and my mother needed to go help take care of her for a little while.  Marcia offered to let me come stay at her house with her!  How cool was that?  It was like a week long slumber party with a high-schooler!!!  And how fun for me, an 11-year-old to be hanging out with a 17-year-old!  And her bedroom was like, straight out of Grease with stuffed toys, posters and twin beds!  I felt so cool!  I'm sure Marcy has no idea how much she meant to me in those days, but I sure did think the world of her.  She was the only one of my brothers' girlfriends who actually seemed to like me!

She was kinda goofy too.  I remember even at my young age thinking she was kind of ditzy and goofy, but she sure was fun.  She loved to have her hair brushed.  She loved to play rummy.  She liked to sleep in late (and probably took a little bit of advantage of me when she had young kids and I was in high school, since we lived in the same house...)  She trusted me to take care of her kids and she couldn't say "aluminum." She took me out driving when I was old enough to work on my driver's license and she cried with me and was there for me when my mom died. I saw Marcy a few years ago when Brooks was living in Las Vegas and so was she.  We all went out to dinner together and she really hadn't changed.  She was still my goofy, ditzy sister and I still love that about her!

High school sweethearts, Al & Marcia married quite young and I remember it causing a good deal of tension at home when Allen asked my parents to sign for him to get a marriage license!  Whooee!  I didn't quite understand it all at the time; they didn't seem that young to me, but I sure remember the yelling!
Marcia gave me my first nephew, Daniel Carl in June, 1967 and my first niece, Gail Lynn, in December, 1968.  All of a sudden, at the age of twelve, I was considered old enough to take care of someone else!!! And Dan & Gail became my living "dolls!"

A very young looking Al, Marcia & Danny
September, 1967

Anyway... Al and Marcia divorced the summer of 1973, a pretty traumatic change for me to deal with what seemed very close to the loss of my mother.  I was glad I was leaving for college soon so I wouldn't feel the difference as strongly.  Relatively, Marcia held an active part in my life for a very short period of time, but she was influential, she was fun and she still holds a very special place in my heart.  I love you Marcy!  Happy Birthday!

And then....many years later.....

On May 23, 1992, Brandon, Barton & their friend, Daniel were baptized in the font in the LDS chapel in Ashland, Ohio!

Barton & Brandon ready for dunk in the font
by their dad, Randy

Exactly eleven years later, on May 23, 2003, Brandon & Barton entered the Vernal, Utah LDS temple to receive their own endowment (instruction, blessings & covenants with God) as they prepared to leave for their missions that summer!

Vernal, Utah LDS Temple

To add to the excitement of that day, add one MORE endowment and the whole family together!  If you'll recall, on Josh's birthday I mentioned the fact that Brooks made it quite clear that she would be married BEFORE her brothers left on their missions or she wouldn't get married until they came home.  With a wedding date set for May 30th, it only made sense for Brooks to receive her endowment right alongside her baby brothers!

Many of our good friends from Vernal as well as Aunt Amy's extended family were there for the big day.  Josh's family even came all the way from Fallon, Nevada to be there in support of Brooks and Josh.  But the best part for me was the fact that I had all five of my now ENDOWED children together with me in the temple!

Megan, Brandon, Brooks, Barton & Samantha
Outside the Vernal Temple
May 23, 2003

I'll never cease to be amazed at the wonderful blessings that have come to me in this life through the gospel of Jesus Christ and all of the loved ones who each have their own special place in my heart.  Happy special day to a lot of special people!

ML #1 (Part B) Tell about your temple sealing

The Salt Lake City Temple
The Church of Jesus Christ of
Latter Day Saints

May 22, 1981 was one of the happiest days of my life.  I felt like I had everything I had ever wanted or could ever want, and I was right. Sixteen months after joining the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints I was finally ready and able to enter the temple of God, to receive instruction to gain a greater understanding of eternity and to be sealed to my family for time and all eternity.

We "Mormons" believe that civil marriage on earth is for this life or for "time."  As we also believe that families can be together forever, we believe the family has to be sealed together, in a temple of God, by one who has the priesthood power and authority to perform this ordinance.  Having lost both of my parents and all my grandparents by the age of twenty, the promise of having eternity with them is a promise so extraordinary, I could hardly wait the requisite year after my baptism to enter the temple!

The day finally arrived though, not quite six weeks after the birth of my second daughter, Samantha.  The fact that I nearly died giving birth to Samantha had given me a whole new appreciation for my own life.  The fact that we still didn't know the extent of Sami's heart defects, the possibility that we might not have her with us long in this life weighed heavily on our minds, but we had our new faith to sustain us and the promise of things to come in the temple.

When we arrived at the Salt Lake Temple, we had to leave the girls in a nursery while Randy and I went on to receive our instruction which ended in the beautiful, peaceful Celestial room of the Temple.

SLC Temple -  Celestial Room

After being given some quiet time in the Celestial room to reflect on the spiritual teachings and blessings we had received and the covenants we had made with our Father in Heaven, we were escorted to a sealing room within the temple.

Sealing Room
Salt Lake City Temple

After receiving some additional instruction from our sealer about the differences between an eternal marriage and a marriage for time we were also taught of the additional blessings promised to those who remain faithful and Christ-centered in their marriage.  Then we knelt across the altar from one another and were sealed together for eternity.  As wonderful as that blessing was, it didn't compare to the love, joy and blessing I felt when the women from the nursery entered the sealing room with our two beautiful little girls, all dressed in white (Meg with curls and a white bow in her hair).  

So like Megan, she entered the quiet, reverent room, looked at Randy and I kneeling across the altar from one another, and, in her chipper voice said, "Heeellooo, Mommy!  Heeelloooo, Daddy!"  So like herself, the twenty people in attendance in the sealing room with us couldn't help but laugh. I however, could do little more than smile as the tears welled up in my eyes. My love and joy has never been stronger than it was in that moment when I looked at my two little angels.  Megan was brought to kneel at the altar with us, while Sami was laid on the altar so I could touch her hand and our two beautiful girls were sealed to us as well.  Not only were we promised to have Megan & Sami to be with us forever, we also received the promise that all additional children would be "born under the covenant" and would be included in that promise and that blessing.

Randy, Meg, Sami & I
Outside the SLC Temple

I know the idea of a "forever family" may sound odd to some reading this blog who don't understand the teachings of the LDS church.  But to me, the teachings of the church were always more of a remembrance to me.  As I listened to the missionaries who taught me the gospel, I knew, in my heart and in my soul that the things they were teaching me were true.  I believe in an eternal family and having been deprived of a lot of my family in this life, I look forward to the day when I will be reunited with them all in the next life.

Being converts to the church, living in the state of Utah made us a bit of a novelty to the members of our ward.  Most members in Utah were born into LDS families.  But, as the novelty in our ward, we received untold amounts of love and support from our "ward family" as we prepared ourselves to enter the temple for the first time. Many of these special friends attended our sealing that beautiful spring day.

Our closest LDS Friends

There were two VERY special people in attendance that day.  Bart Chournos, the missionary who worked with Randy and I for six straight months.  Bart had promised me when I was baptized in January that he wouldn't be transferred until Randy was ready to be baptized as well.  Sure enough, Bart was transferred two days after Randy's baptism in March!  Our son, Barton, is named for Bart.  What a special friend and blessing he has been through the years, especially in his very close relationship to Meg!

Bart & Meg with Susan & Sami
Temple grounds
(Love Bart's afro!)

The other VERY special person with us that day was Susan Call.  Now, stories of Susan need to be a blog all in and of itself, but Susan was there for us, just as she was every day from the time we moved to Utah until we were sealed and every day since! She's truly a one-of-a-kind woman who loves people and you can't help but love her back!  My kids all grew up knowing her as "Aunt Susan," because she's just that close.

Have I mentioned how important that day was to me?  I don't know how to even express how important it was and still is to me to this day.  It was the day I knew I wanted to work in the temple, it was the day I promised to obey God's commandments and to keep my covenants; it was the day I was promised to have my children to be with me through eternity AND it was the day I truly came to understand and believe exactly how I could still have an eternity with my mom, my dad and all of my other loved ones.  "I belong to the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints.  I know who I am. I know God's plan. I'll follow him in faith. I believe in the Savior, Jesus Christ. I'll honor his name. I'll do what is right. I'll follow his light. His truth I will proclaim."

"I Love to See the Temple"

"I have a family here on earth. They are so good to me. I want to share my life with them through all eternity.  Families can be together forever, through Heavenly Father's plan. I always want to be with my own family and the Lord has shown me how I can."

I bear witness and testify of these things, in the name of Jesus Christ. Amen.

LN #6a Tell about proud moments as a mother/grandmother

Has it really been two weeks already?????

Program for Bart's Graduation

Sarai & I after her baptism

I had a GREAT vacation two weeks ago!  I was able to go to Kentucky to attend Bart's graduation from the University of Kentucky Dental School and so that more family was able to attend, Sarai was baptized over the weekend too!  It made for the typical Sloan family get together chaos, but as usual, it was well worth it!

I flew in on a red-eye at 6:00 AM on May 3rd.  Meg picked me up and transported me to her house to catch a few hours of sleep before the fun began!  That afternoon we ran errands all over Florence until the kids got home from school and then we were on our way to Lexington.  Brandon and Brooks had already arrived with their families, so we checked into the hotel and headed over to Bart's for the evening.  

Fortunately, Meg's kids have spent a lot of weekends with Bart & Emily over the past four years, so the bishop of their ward knew Sarai and was willing to let them hold her baptism there.  So, Saturday morning the family all met with  a lot of their friends at the chapel in Lexington and Sarai's daddy, Samuel, baptized her with a lot of her cousins and uncles to witness it!  She was so beautiful and so excited to have everyone there for her special day.  Sarai has grown up a lot in the past year and I'm so proud of her.

Meg planned refreshments for everyone there around a pink and white theme, including different flavors of popcorn and jelly bellies from "PaPa's" popcorn shop!  Other than Samuel getting lost on the way to the chapel, everything else was flawless and "a good time was had by all!" (I haven't gotten a picture of Sarai with her family yet; Emily's dad was the "official" weekend photographer!)

[The week was enhanced with multiple additional celebrations.  Sunday was Diedre's birthday.  Tuesday was Mason's (even though he was gone by then...) Wednesday was Brandon's & Barton's 29th birthday and we celebrated by going to watch the new Iron Man movie (be still my heart)!]

Can you believe they didn't want cake?
We had 2 separate birthday dinners
and a birthday breakfast though!

After the baptism, it was on to Bart's for a cookout, swimming at the hotel and games galore!  Sunday morning we attended Stake Conference with Bart & Emily and then we all got ready for Bart's big day!  How on earth did we go from this:

Kindergarten Bart
1989

to this, so doggone fast???

Dr. Bawty
May 5, 2013

My Bawty.  My fun-loving, goofy little boy who could always make me smile, could always make me laugh and was practically always in the middle of any chaos in the house has gone and grown up and become a responsible adult on me.  There are times I miss my baby boy.  Oh, I don't mean I miss Barton; that's a given.  I miss having all my kids at home.  No. I mean I miss MY baby boy!  I miss the teasing. I miss the singing.  I miss the corny pick-up lines that he'd practice on his sisters and their friends.  I miss the boy with the afro.  I miss the drawings and maybe I even miss some of the stupid fights. I miss hearing Brooks complain when he or Brandon tried to crawl into her bed to sleep because they didn't want to go upstairs to their cold bedroom.  I miss going to plays and HiLites concerts.  I miss 4 White Guys and a Korean. I miss being coerced into going to midnight movie releases. I miss the "old" jokes and I miss having my baby crawl into my bed before going to his own to tell me about his day or his date.  I miss listening to hymns in stereo at church. And I miss the big hugs and the kisses on the cheek.

Love the kisses on the cheek!

But, most of all I think I miss my boys being together.  I can never pass up a picture of my boys together for important times in their lives:

Yep!  No matter what one of my kids accomplishes, no matter how proud I am of them, I can't help but long for the "good old days" when I had them all under my roof and knew what they were doing (well, thought I knew) every day of their lives.

One short; Bart, Meg, Brand & Brooks

I've actually been quite worried for Barton for the past year and a half.  He lost the enthusiasm in his voice; the teasing went away; in it's place was seriousness and stress and the 1-2 times weekly calls decreased to 1-2 month.  I know he had a lot on his mind; going after this dream that has become a reality, but I was quite relieved to see his old smile back at graduation.

It's been fun to see how his personality has transformed so that he brings some of himself into his work.  He's always loved being around kids; I think it gives him an excuse to still act like a kid himself.  So, it's not surprising that he's decided to specialize in pediatric dentistry.  He participated in a volunteer program all through dental school taking annual trips to the impoverished areas of Kentucky, offering free dental care to the kids.  It was always exciting and heart-warming to hear how he talked (or sang) with the kids to help them relax and understand what he was going to do.  And he even wrote & illustrated a book for kids about a visit to the dentist! And the dentist bears a striking resemblance to Dr. Bawty....  (I tried to figure out how to insert it here, but I only have it as a PowerPoint and couldn't do it!)

So, he and Emily are on to their next adventure, actually moving into Zielke territory, where he'll serve his residency in Wauwatosa, Wisconsin. He'll be a short drive from my brother and multiple cousins, nieces and nephews.  I'm hoping they'll be able to use these next two years to get to know more of my family.

But for now as he is packing up and getting ready to head for the Badger State and on to becoming a Cheesehead, I know they leave with mixed emotions.  They've made a lot of good friends in Kentucky and have been blessed to be within driving distance of siblings and nieces and nephews.  I know they'll all miss him as much as he'll miss them.  But, that's what life's about.  We make our choices and we go where those choices take us.  I know the future is bright for Barton and I know he has great things yet to accomplish.  For now, one more time, I just want to say I'm proud of you, Bawty Boy--oh, excuse me--- DOCTOR Bawty Boy.  Congratulations! I love you!

The Cheering Section
We did a splendid job of letting the other graduates
know that Bart had Fam-i-lee!

A YouTube Reminder of Your Days at UK

"My Old Kentucky Home"

(You might recognize a few scenes...)

WC # 10 Happy Birthday Josh AND Happy Anniversary Bart & Emily!

'Tis a double-header day in the Sloan family, May 19th is!!!  Since I haven't done any anniversary posts yet and I have devoted posts to family birthdays, today's primary focus will be on Josh, but first, I just want to wish a very happy 6th anniversary to Bart & Emily!!!

The WHOLE Sloan Family
Salt Lake City LDS Temple
May 19, 2007

Wishing you both a bright and blessed future for many, many years to come!
I love you!

And now, on to Josh....

Joshua David Gailey, born May 19, 1981, was first introduced to the family the winter of 2002.  I probably know Josh better than I know any of my other sons/daughters-in-law just because of the timing and logistics involved in his and Brooks' courtship.

I remember sitting in Brooks' car when she was telling me about this new guy that asked her out.  He wasn't the typical guy Brooks went for, she was generally pretty picky about the men she chose to go out with and Josh didn't quite fit the bill.  One of his eyes strays due to a toddler eye surgery gone bad when said toddler smashed his corrective glasses in the door because they gave him a headache and his eye bothered her.  Fortunately, however, his charm, sense of humor and naivete won her over.  She fell for him and decided to let him into her life.

Brooks & Josh
Dating in Rexburg

We all knew she was a goner before she would admit it.  The whole family was together for Christmas in Pocatello, Idaho for the birth of the first baby in the family and Brooks kept leaving the room to check her email; but she wasn't checking to see if Josh had written her....but funny how chipper she was when he had...

I knew Josh was going to fit in with the rest of the family.  Before Brandon and Barton met him, I warned them about his eye and told them NOT to say a word.  Not that I thought they'd really say anything bad, but it would be like one of them to say "Hey! What's up with your eye?"  I wasn't sure how Josh would react and I knew Brooks wouldn't like it, so I just told them to behave.  Imagine their joy when Josh was the one who brought it up!?!?! And then to excite them even more, he demonstrated his ability to put a glass in his mouth!  Yep.  He had the twins' approval.

One slight problem.  The romance was going along splendidly, but Brooks had a specific requirement.  She's extremely close to her brothers and insisted that they be able to attend her wedding.  Since they were prepping to leave on their missions for two years, she decided that she would either be married before they left OR she would wait two years until they got back.  Next thing I knew, Josh and Brooks were engaged and a May wedding was planned!

Josh & Brooks
Manti, Utah LDS Temple
May 30, 2003

Josh & Brooks moved in with me the summer after they got married and that's when I really got to know him. He painted the bedrooms in my poor little house in Butte, Montana, built a wardrobe for the closet-less bedroom and remodeled my garage into an extra bedroom for when more family came to visit.

It wasn't just the hard work I appreciated in Josh though.  He tolerates my stupid questions.  Always has answers, whether their right or not; he's very good at making things up that SOUND right! (It took me a little while to figure out that he frequently DID make things up!) He also made it a personal challenge to try to crack the Walmart jargon code.  Since Brooks had worked at Walmart since she was sixteen, she understood things that I was talking about when I'd come home on the weekends and I'm afraid we lapsed into Walmartian language.  He became quite good at cracking the code though and even began to join in the discussions.

He's also good at coming to my rescue...he's good at finding solutions to my questions; he helped me solve my problem when I couldn't figure out how to insert pictures into my blog; he has a great memory and helps me find things; and heck, he even rescued me in bed once!  We were all in Fallon, Nevada for Dylan's blessing and his parents were kind enough to offer several of us beds to sleep in.  I got his sister Angela's water bed.  Problem was, turns out, Angela preferred the bed not be full so it was softer & squishier.  I woke up in the middle of the night and had to go to the bathroom and since the mattress was below the side of the bed, as I sat on the edge, my feet wouldn't touch the floor.  I kept trying to rock to get up enough momentum to hurl out of the bed to no avail.  Feeling that I was surely going to end up wetting the bed (I guess I could have said the bed sprang a leak!) I threw myself back on the bed in frustration and growled.  At the same time though, my hands hit the wall and woke Brooks.  Worried about me, she got Josh to come check on me.

Nearly in tears, I had to tell Josh I couldn't get out of the bed.  He didn't even laugh at me! (Well, at least not to my face!) He just took both of my hands, we counted to three and he pulled!  What a hero!

Josh is a great dad.  I first realized how good he would be when I watched him playing ring-around-the-rosey with these two little angels!

Andi & Cari
Thanksgiving, 2004

Of course, by this time, he was already a father, but Ethan was a little young to join in on the game.  But, every time the girls cried for more "rosey," Uncle Josh was holding hands and falling down with them on cue!

Ethan (in a "dress") with Andi
Thanksgiving, 2004

One of the truly amazing things about Josh is his willingness to ask me for advice about raising his children!  I mean how many dads do that?  But even when he saw that I had purchased "dresses" for his SON to sleep in as an infant, he went along with it and guess what?!?!?!  He actually decided that even though they were nightgowns, they REALLY were quite handy for those middle of the night diaper changes! I had to smile when I saw Josh holding Claire, wearing her new nightgowns two weeks ago when the family was together for Bart's graduation!

Josh & Sloan playing with bubbles
August, 2008

I have a sneaking suspicion that Josh would agree with this Jack Handy quote:

• Children need encouragement. If a kid gets an answer right, tell him it was a lucky guess. That way he develops a good, lucky feeling.

Josh spoils Brooks.  I sure hope she appreciates him.  He's always gotten up in the night with all of the kids and he is always willing to play with them and comfort them.  (Not always the best at discipline; but he tries.  And he's gotten better over the years.  He just doesn't always recognize the "playing dad against mom" game!)  He helps cook and clean. He lets her sleep.  He recognizes her frustrations and encourages & supports her.  He makes her laugh. He remembers their anniversary and her birthday and never misses an opportunity to make her feel special.

He blesses their home with his priesthood; ensuring his children recognize the love and guidance of a Heavenly Father. He participates in Family Home Evening, reads scriptures with his family each night and teaches them to pray.

When Josh & Brooks first started dating, he was planning on becoming an architect. Perfect mate for an Interior Design major, right?  Over time, that went by the wayside.  For a little while it seemed that teaching might be an option and somehow it evolved into a career in dentistry!

Dr. Gailey and Family

2011

And along with completing his doctorate, he also became a captain in the United States army....

Captain & Mrs. Josh Gailey

Josh is a very special young man.  His kids are blessed to have him as a father.  Brooks is lucky to have him as a husband. The rest of the family loves and appreciates him and I think I speak for everyone when I say Happy Birthday Captain Doctor Josh!

• If you're robbing a bank and your pants fall down, I think it's okay to laugh, and let your hostages laugh too, because come on - life is funny- Jack Handy