Sunday, January 20, 2013

EY#20: Tell about your Best Friend!

So, I decided that I needed to do a post tonight that would be a bit more fun and NOTHING is more fun than my best friend!  I've been fortunate enough to have several really great friends in my life; that happens when you move around a lot.  I have wonderful friends from my college/sorority days, from thirty-three years as a Latter Day Saint and from a twenty-one year career with Walmart, but no one can take the place in my life and in my heart of my best buddy, Lanie!

My cousin, Norm, took this picture of us at our high school graduation open house in 1973, but the story begins long before this was taken......

As you'll recall, I started life in Aurora, moved to Wisconsin for a few years and then moved back to Aurora in 1967.  I had a best friend named Janice Graham when I moved to Wisconsin and, silly me, I assumed we would still be best friends when I moved back four years later.  Alas, I had become a "country bumpkin," a "farm kid" and Janice had moved on to much cooler friends.  She was still nice enough but one day about a week after we started 7th grade we were walking home from school and Janice pointed to this weird girl walking ahead of us and said to me "I think you should get to know Elaine.  I think you could be friends."  

I should have recognized that my "friend" was trying to get rid of me, but I looked at the girl with the waist length hair, pulled off her forehead with a plastic headband, glasses, a blue plaid parochial-looking skirt with a purple, green and yellow leaf-pattern shirt, knee-highs and loafers and replied, "Her?  I don't think we'd have much in common."  I mean, after all, I was cool! I had a hip-hugger skirt with a fashionably wide belt, fish-net stockings and mini go-go boots!  Next thing I knew, Janice had given me a push on the crowded sidewalk and I nearly fell into Elaine! What could I do but say hello?  That wasn't exactly the moment we became best friends, but it is my first clear memory of her, even though we were in the same class at K.D.Waldo Jr. High.  For that one moment in time, I owe Janice Graham a great debt, for giving me the best friend a girl could ever hope to have!

Another very early memory of Lanie, just a few days after our "introduction," was in gym class. (Well, honestly, there are a few great memories of gym class, but I can only cover one at a time)  We were  playing field hockey and you have to understand, I am NOT an athlete! Much to my mother's and my brothers' disappointment, I don't have a coordinated bone in my body, so I did not go looking for opportunities to be front and center in gym class, but somehow this day I ended up with the puck or ball or whatever the heck it was we were playing with.  Next thing I know I'm surrounded by a bunch of vicious girls from the other team swinging their clubs. One bumps into me, I lose my balance and another one trips me with her club! Down I go and away go the other girls with the prize.  I'm sitting on the ground in tears with a very painful ankle and who comes up but this geeky Elaine-girl and says "Does it hurt?" I don't remember what I said... I'm sure it wasn't nice.  At the very best it was probably sarcastic, 'cause that's the kind of person I am, but I knew I didn't want to be making small talk with Elaine at that moment! (I came to find out almost 30 years later that I broke my ankle that day on the field; never went to the doctor 'cause my jock older brother said "It's a sprain. Walk it off."  I only found out when my ankle was x-rayed for another break about thirty years later and the ER doctor told me it never healed properly the LAST time it was broken! Thanks Al!)

But, back to gym class.  I just have to share this story of another day, after we had become friends, 'cause it makes me laugh, still, right now!  I have tears in my eyes thinking about it, which is really cruel, but it was so flippin' funny!

So, kids... back in the olden days, we had to take showers every day after gym class so we weren't all stinky the rest of the day.  Well, not only did we have to take showers, but there were no curtains; the showers were wide open.  And you weren't allowed to take anything into them with you and you weren't given a towel until you were on your way OUT!  I was never really sure if I was lucky that my locker was toward the back so that I had to parade through the whole locker room in my birthday suit or if it would have been worse having one of the front lockers so that everyone going in and out of the shower could watch me dressing and undressing, but that's not part of my story.  So, anyway, Lanie was headed to the shower in front of me... both of us walkin' in all our glory when she takes one step into the shower room, her foot hits the slick tile floor and both feet fly up in front of her and she lands flat on her arse!  Now if you think the visual is bad, I wish we had sound effects!  You know the sound of a bad belly-flop in the pool?  Yep!  Just imagine poor Lanie's bare hiney hittin' that wet, hard tile!  She had class though. It had to hurt like heck, but she swiftly alighted to her feet and proceeded into the shower while I stood outside doubled over in laughter!  Some kinda friend I was, huh?  At least I didn't start laughing until AFTER she had gotten up and I was relatively certain she wasn't hurt.  Come to think of it, both Lanie and I had some of our best laughs at one another's expense from a fall or an accident of some kind... so don't think she didn't have her opportunities to laugh at me!

However, I can see that one post is not going to be nearly enough to tell you about my best friend, Lanie.  I mean, we have forty-five years of history.  But, this was an introduction and I hope you'll enjoy the adventure of getting to know the best bud in the world!

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