I could tell because when I got to work, I found out that the package of lanyards I ordered with priority shipping on March 1st hadn't arrived yet and it's March 12th, and the company I ordered them from sent me the tracking number but my work computer was acting up and wouldn't let me access the Internet to track it and if I don't have those lanyards by Friday, I'm going to be in a lot of trouble and look like a total loser in front of a bunch of people my boss wants me to impress. I think I'll try to transfer to Australia!
My PARTNER at work was able to get on the Internet from his laptop! And when he did, he looked up my tracking number and said my package was delivered at 12:41 on March 4th. Happy Birthday to me. But last Friday when I asked the girl in receiving if she had seen a package come for me, she said she hadn't seen anything all week and now I knew she was lying and I could tell it was going to be a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day.
I could tell because when I went back to receiving to confront "Veronica," she said it was from USPS. Sometimes they deliver right to the service desk with the mail, but when I went to the service desk, no one there had ever seen it and when I asked the girl if she worked last Monday afternoon, she said "No. I worked 9-4:00." I thought "Doesn't that include the afternoon?" I could tell it was going to be a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day!
The girl at the service desk said sometimes the customer service managers pick up packages that they think are for the accounting office, but when I asked the CSM to look he said that there's nothing in the accounting office and maybe I should check in Personnel, because if it was lanyards, someone might have thought they were for the associates and Maggie would want them, but when I went to ask Maggie, she said she didn't have them, but maybe they were in the managers' office, but when I asked if the manager was in she said "No. They're still out walking the floor, but did you check with Jessica in invoicing, because they give her all the mail to sort, but when I went to find Jessica, they said she had the day off and I could tell it was going to be a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day.
I could tell, because then I had to sort through the list of ideas for games the other trainers in the Pacific Division sent me as possible "Olympic Events" for our meeting next week in Denver. Everyone had sent what they thought were really fun games, but no one had bothered to give me any ideas as to how to adapt them to fit team rotations, eliminations and medals and I had two hours until my conference call with a bunch of these same people that my boss wants me to impress. Oh and by-the-way, Staples messed up the print order I submitted to them yesterday to go along with the lanyards and I had to go back today to pick up the re-do and have holes punched into the top of the laminated badges I had printed, but the girl was in a hurry and punched the holes through the writing on half of them and punched the other half off-center. I think I want to pursue that transfer to Australia.
I got back to work fifteen minutes before my "games" conference call was supposed to begin and of course they called on me first. I gave them all my ideas for fun games (like "Are you Smarter than a Senior Manager? and Walmart-egories) that my team wanted to play with the adaptations my partner and I had figured out and everyone else was just quiet. Then they started telling about the games their teams wanted to play; things like relay races and "Minute-to-win-it" competitions and I felt like a loser and knew it WAS a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day!
I knew it because after my call, my partner suggested we ask Asset Protection to view video of the receiving area and the service desk and see who received my package, but when I knocked on AP's door, there was no one there and when I asked people if they had seen AP, everyone said no and when I emailed her boss, he said that she was gone to training today and after Chris, my partner, convinced an assistant manager to view the video for us, she came back and said the postman didn't deliver anything at either door between 12:30 and 1:00 on that day and guess we were out of luck
When I called the post office to see if they could tell me who signed for the package, they said a signature wasn't required, but I could file a claim and they could find out from the postman where he delivered it and when I said, "Okay, let's do that," she said "Our system is down. You'll have to try back later." And when I said "Do you have a phone number, because your automated system is annoying and takes me through all kinds of questions and surveys that don't help and the only reason I got through to you now is because Chris just kept hitting the # key until someone answered," she said "When the automated script begins, all you have to do is say 'Customer Service' or punch '0' and it will transfer you directly to us." Who knew??? I bet they know it in Australia!
When I called back later and asked if their system was back up, the new lady said "Yes it is. Would you like to file a claim?" I said, "Yes, I would!" and she took my information and I felt like maybe I was getting somewhere until she said "Someone will get back with you in 24 hours." But NOW what do I do??? Today is Tuesday. I need the lanyards by Friday so I can take them with me on the plane on Monday! I guess I'll try to re-order them.
But I was reminded that it was indeed a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day when I finally accessed the Internet only to have problems with the site freezing, so I decided to call them. Charles was a very nice young man, and I thought maybe it's not such a bad day. He offered to refill the order and then sort out the problem with the missing lanyards later so I could have them reshipped priority and get them in time. He said, "Let's pull up your order and I'll take care of this for you."
"Okay, Charles."
"Oh, oh."
"What's wrong?"
"I'm sorry, Ma'am. We're out of the yellow."
"Oh, well, you have a gold-colored one. How about that one?"
"Let me check. We're out of that one too."
"Oh no."
"And, Ma'am?"
"Yes?"
"We're out of the white one too."
"Okay. I see another lanyard that's two cents more. Do you have that one in yellow and white."
"Let me check. I'm sure we do."
"Oh good."
"Uh, ma'am?"
"Yes?
"We don't have them in that lanyard either."
"Oh, no...."
"They're very popular colors."
"I can tell. Well, what can we do now?"
"Well.... let me go look in the warehouse. My computer just says we're low on those colors. Let me go physically check. Can I call you back?
"Please."
Did I say Charles was a nice young man? He called back less than ten minutes later and told me he did have enough yellow and white to fill my order! I asked Charles if he could ship them to my home address instead of work and he said he was going to suggest that... Maybe I don't need to transfer to Australia! Maybe it's not such a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day!
I thought so because after I left work I ran home, changed into my western duds (including Roper shirt & vest and cowboy hat) and headed to the church to prepare for the Relief Society birthday party that I was in charge of. I got my thirty pounds of BBQ pork warming in a big pot, pulled all of the dishes and napkins out of the cupboard and waited for the other women to help set up and decorate. It was a great night with great food, fun line dancing (the priesthood men who served our dinner also performed a line dance for us!) and a beautiful, spiritual closing program around our "campfire" (made of colored butcher paper and flashlights). I thought what a great day to be surrounded by such wonderful women who always pitch in and make it happen and I thought, "Who needs Australia?"
But then I got home and someone was parked in my parking space and I was irritated, but I just sighed and thought "oh well, I'll find another spot, put my permit on the rearview mirror and leave a note on the offender's car and ask them not to do that again," but then I drove past my building and the next building and couldn't find any open parking spots. I turned around and drove the other direction past two buildings and couldn't find any open spots and I thought "This REALLY IS a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day." I parked behind the offending car, got out and proceeded to knock on doors in our building, to give everyone an opportunity to move the car. No one answered most of the doors, but I did meet new neighbors in two of the apartments. They were all very nice. The apartment next to me has a new baby girl named Willow (born six days before our baby Claire) and a pit bull named Brutus, but I didn't find the owner of the car and I called the tow truck.
I could tell because when I called the tow truck, the lady said, you have to stay by the car until the driver gets there and I said okay, but then the driver called me ten minutes later and asked me directions to my building when he got into the apartment complex. I told him and he said "You do have your lease agreement with you, don't you?"
And I said, "No. I don't carry that around in my car."
"Well, Ma'am, I have to have it. Towing a car without that is like 'grand theft auto.'"
"Well, I'll be illegally parked if I go in the house to get it."
"Well, I need you to have it for me when I get there."
"Well, I'm going to be parked illegally, so if you get here before I find it, you better not tow me!"
And he laughed. And he said "I won't, ma'am. I'll be there in a minute."
And then when I came inside to find my lease, I couldn't remember where I put my renewal but found my original and thought, I wonder if he'll notice the date is expired, but I decided to risk it, but took along some recent mail and the new online rent payment information to show him I still live here.
And when he got here he asked for my papers and made me sign authorization forms to tow the car away and then he said "It's mine now!" and then he started attaching all kinds of stuff to the car to lift it with the winch and I watched as all my neighbors looked out their windows and suddenly had to take their dogs for their nightly walks and all looked at me like I was the bad guy and I wondered if I'd have these problems in Australia?
And then when the tow truck was almost ready to go the driver called me back over and said "Oh. I forgot to ask to see some ID. Could you get me one?"
And I said "Sure thing," but I was really thinking "shouldn't the first girl I talked to have told me that they'd need my lease agreement and an ID? I wonder if they're better prepared in Australia?"
And then the tow truck pulled the red Ford Contour out of my spot and the driver waved good-bye to me and the whole line of cars that were waiting to get around us both and FINALLY, I pulled into my parking spot and thought... "Wow. This has REALLY been a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day... but I'm too tired to transfer to Australia!"
The inspiration for this blog:
Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day
Wow sorry you had such a lousy day! But I sure enjoyed reading your story. ;)
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